There’s an absence in my eye… these eyes it would beautify
But I call his name in the depths of night and hear no reply
* * *
A thought that scares me when for him yearning
How many were born only to die waiting?
I ask myself when I feel he’s not listening
Is he waiting for me to start preparing?
His absence on me is great… on my shoulders, the world’s weight
I wonder if he’s waiting for his servant to truly wait
* * *
I wander a world that on its pillars burns
With each flicker of a flame, him my heart yearns
Do we ask as searching for him the world turns
Do our concerns weigh up to Mehdi’s concerns?
Do we want him to return… because in trials we burn
He is waiting for us whilst we wait for him, when will we yearn?
* * *
I ask myself when, distressed, I cry his name
Would I stand up at his service if he came?
Would my tongue dare for his absence give him blame
When my own wretched self I just cannot tame
Can I blame that he’s absent… every Thursday he’d lament
The moment I sin makes my Imam lament, what a moment
* * *
Can I cry when his absence on me would prey?
I can’t even read Nudba on a Friday
The sun absent from eyes every single day
Yet I can’t read Dua Ahad in his way
All these complaints on my tongue… but the prayers for him are none
I look at myself and ask for him what have I really done?
* * *
When I see that a drop of blood has been spilt
With the weight of this drop I feel the world tilt
It breaks my heart thinking what oppressed have felt
Watching their world burn and with it their dreams melt
That tear-drop left in an eye… of an orphan that screams why
Makes me wonder what I’ve done for Mehdi and my head falls shy
* * *
I raise my head proclaiming to him an oath
May I know him more with every day of growth
When encountered by those him and his Lord loath
Be it man or my own self I’ll destroy both
If my soul’s an enemy… then I’ll throw this soul away
Because you’ll fill its place just like you soothe that which turns hair grey
* * *
O’ Mehdi I call out, extending my hand
If upset you turn away, I’ll understand
But just tell me where you reside, in which land
And by your door, at your service I shall stand
Here I am at your service… everything else is worthless
I seek your door and your house but find no key and no address
* * *
(London – 08/08/14)